1. Oh god I’m so tired I can’t wait to go to bed.

*Crawls into bed*

2. Wow, the second I crawled into bed I suddenly became completely awake. ISN’T THAT IRONIC?!

3. THIS ROOM IS SO COLD!

*Cuddles under covers

4. WHY IS THIS ROOM A MILLION DEGREES?

*Spends 15-20 minutes switching back and forth from no covers to all covers.

5. What am I supposed to do with my arms? Do I fold them or should I spread them?

6. Is it weird that I sleep like a fetus?

7. Why is my pillow so uncomfortable?

8. God, how is it already 2 am?

9. Come on God, please let me get some sleep. I have to get up at 7 am.

10. Why is my foot asleep? What is this phantom limb/ black magic shit?

11. I’m thirsty.

12. Fuck, my eyes have adjusted to the darkness so now I can see everything.

13. Yay 3:30am

14. I’m not going to get any sleep am I?

Flails in bed in a fit of rage.

15. You know I spent so much money on getting my own room just so I could get some sleep and THIS IS BULLSHIT.

Falls asleep at some undetermined time. Wakes up 5 minutes before alarm clock.

16. How the fuck is it already 7 am?

17. I’m not getting out of bed yet, I’m finally comfortable.

Rolls out of bed 20 minutes late.

18. Fuck this day.