The Definitive Ranking of Scream Deaths

 

10.) Trudie/Sherrie/Rachel/Marnie/Jenny

The opening of Scream 4 should have been entertaining. I mean who hasn’t wanted to watch both Anna Paquin AND Shenae Grimes die? Unfortunately the “movie within a movie within a movie” thing was completely overdone and by the time the real opening kill sequence started no one gave a fuck. #toomanywhitewomensolittletime

 

9. ) Rebecca Walters

Let’s be real- the only reason Rebecca was included in this movie was so that they could feature an interesting kill in the trailers. Rebecca was a completely underdeveloped and irrelevant character, only included to give the film a high body count. The only thing her death did was make me a bit more hesitant to walk through parking garages alone.

 

8.)  Stu Macher

Stu was arguably the most deranged out of all the Ghostface killers, for the sole fact that he really had no motive beyond being crazy. That’s why his death was so glorious- I mean who didn’t want to see Shaggy get electrocuted to death by a TV getting pushed onto his head?

 

7.)  Maureen Evans

Oh Wes Craven, why you gotta kill off the two black people before the title sequence? Maureen, like her boyfriend, is a complete throwaway character. For starters, she was played by Jada Pinkett Smith who didn’t do anything memorable until spawning the great philosopher, Jaden and the motive for killing her character (because she shared the same name as Sidney’s mother) is beyond dumb. And while it’s entertaining to watch her get stabbed to death in a theater, I can’t help but think that Brenda’s death in Scary Movie was infinitely more memorable.

 

6.) Cici Cooper

Let’s be real- Cici Cooper is COMPLETELY IRRELEVANT. She has little to no relation to any of the characters and she’s only included because Sarah Michelle Gellar is flawless and was apparently free for one day of filming. But being that SMG is flawless you can’t help but root for Cici during her chase scene. And even though you know she’s going to die, you cheer for her as she valiantly attempts to escape. But she is pretty easily thrown off the balcony though, which docks her some points.

 

5.) Jennifer Jolie

Jennifer Jolie is a bit like a benign tumor- annoying but harmless. But compared to the rest of supporting characters in Scream 3 (the worst film of the series by far), she’s a breath of fresh air. Also she’s played by Parker Posey who is hilarious. Jennifer’s death is actually one of the sadder one in the series, as she is sliced and diced without anyone able to see her. And that’s precisely why I avoid those creepy mirror mazes at carnivals.

4.) Jill Roberts

Jill was annoying as FUCK. That’s a fact. Which is what made seeing her get electrocuted by defibrillators and shot all the more entertaining. She was the most insufferable of Scream villains which made her death so sweet. If only all of that could happen to Emma in real live.

 

3.) Olivia Roberts

 

Olivia was a pretty underdeveloped character and with boobs as big as head we all knew she wouldn’t make it that far in the film. With that being said, DAYUMM… girl had the grisliest death of the entire franchise. It actually pained me to watch her thrown around so violently and part of me wished Ghostface would have just sliced her throat to put her out of her misery. Why you got to gut her, Ghostface?

 

2.) Tatum Riley

Tatum’s death is an iconic moment of the franchise and an example of slasher film originality. She’s a pretty well developed character for the most part and despite her wearing clothes that expose her nipples, she’s a classy broad. Her death is both funny and terrifying in its ridiculousness. But I’ll never forget watching that bitch dangle from the doggie door.

 

1.) Casey Becker

Of course Casey is #1 on this list. The opening sequence of Scream is one of the best slasher film moments of all time. For starters, kudos to Wes Craven for killing of the film’s most famous actor in the first ten minutes of the movie. This sequence set up the entire Scream franchise and from the moment it starts you can’t help but wonder where it’s going to go. I find myself rooting for Casey every time and as Ghostface emotionally tortures her you can’t help but empathize with her. But what makes the sequence so successful is that escape is a possibility for most of it. You know there’s a chance that she could live to see another day- which makes her death so sad. Kudos to you, Drew Barrymore for doing something that didn’t suck #Blended.

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