Flaafy is both gay AND European. He’s the type of gay who cares more about his appearance than whether or not women have reproductive rights. He’s always well dressed and well groomed. In fact, his hair is insured for $10,000! He may be superficial and dumb but he’s pretty so it works.




Illumise is one of those tux wearing lesbian types- but it isn’t because she’s butch but rather because she thinks it’s trendy (which it isn’t). She’s a performer at heart and loves putting on a show- whether that means singing on stage or starting drama any place she can. She’s also one of those bitches that dyes her hair lavender because she’s all about the trends.


Weavile is a “take no prisoners” type of bisexual. She’s a thrill to be around but her extreme behavior and outrageous tendencies make her quite intimidating. She loves any and all outdoor activities, including hot yoga, which no one should like. So yeah she’s hot but fucking crazy.


Gourgeist is the lesbian who works at your local coffee shop. She’s well read, likes alternative music and has a questionable haircut. She’s a sweet girl with a goofy sense of humor. And she just LOVES hummus and everything organic…so make of that what you will.


Scrafty is a lesbian who is all about the fitness. Whenever she’s not shredding it in the gym you can find her “marrying the night” on her Harley. She’s not necessarily the most friendly person but I can guarantee that if you got into a bar fight she’d be the first person to throw down for you. Scrafty LIVES for knife fights!


Kangashkan is a take charge kind of lesbian. She’s at the top of the corporate ladder, the mother of a future doctor and the president of several local charities. She needs to be involved in everything because she can’t bear to watch idiots try and run things. She may be a bitch but she’s a boss ass one.



Machamp is the kind of gay man who cares more about his dick pics than he does about anything else. He lives at the gym and makes it his job to keep his body right and tight. He may not be the smartest or kindest guy, but he looks great naked. And that counts for something, right?



Rapidash is 2 Fab 2 Not Be Gay. I mean it’s a scientific fact that all of the unicorns were gay. That’s why they died out.



For every perfectly styled, bronzed up gay guy out there there’s one who’s homely as fuck. That’s Tangela. He may not shower regularly or know how to interact with anyone but his mother but he’s decent enough. Tangela has a problem with letting people in- but for fair reason- I mean I know I can’t be the only one who doesn’t want to see what’s under the vines.



Hypno is one of those distinguished homosexuals with a 401K and brandy collection. He likes his men like he likes his wine- in the basement.





Weepinbell is the village bicycle of the gay community. And you can’t blame him- look at those DSLs.


The lesbian equivalent of Weepinbell.





Not gay…just a hipster douche bag.