Being a blog devoted to the pursuit of being single it is only natural that we go on a rant about Valentine’s Day. Valentine’s Day is definitely not my favorite holiday but I don’t hate it by any means. I’m not here to shit on the holiday and complain about how much it sucks being single on the day of if because we all know how I feel about the single life. This will be my first Valentine’s Day in a while celebrating single yet as it approaches quickly I don’t find myself hating my life and desperately searching for a Valentine. I’ve celebrated Valentine’s day in a number of ways. I’ve spent it waiting for my boyfriend to get back from basketball practice bored out of my mind. I’ve spent the day hostessing all night for a fancy dinner with tables scattered with roses and candles. I’ve also spent the day surprising my ex with little gifts all day when he least expected it and getting surprises in return. This year, I’ll be spending it with my girlfriends.
I want to point out here that as much as I embrace being single I’m a hopeless romantic when I’m in love. I’d be lying if I said this holiday didn’t bring me back to where I was a year ago. I got surprised with roses, chocolates, and a sweet card after a long day of working. It’s not just Valentine’s Day that takes me back to moments like this though. I get reminded of these moments on other holiday’s as well. I get reminded of these moments in songs. I get reminded of these moments all.the.time. It’s pointless to blame a holiday on bringing me back to a place where I was in love when I know that there are an endless amount of reminders surrounding me. I also can’t hate this holiday now when just last year it brought me butterflies and love. I’m not going to sit here and argue that it’s a stupid holiday when I know firsthand how happy I was last year when my boyfriend surprised me.
I know people argue that Valentine’s Day is a pointless holiday and that people shouldn’t need it as an excuse to share their love. But what is so wrong with a small holiday reminding you to show someone you care? Does Mother’s Day get this sort of treatment? I’ll be the first to defend the fact that you should always be able to show someone you care and random acts of kindness are great. With that said, what’s so wrong with a little reminder to show someone you care? We shouldn’t be focusing so much on the expectation that someone is going to buy you flowers but rather the chance that the holiday might give someone the courage to tell you how they feel. Sometimes this day gives people the ability to finally express themselves and not that they need an excuse, but they have a solid one.
When I began to think about writing an article about Valentine’s Day I initially thought that I was going to devote it to the simple fact that we can eat an ass load of awesome chocolate. I still think I could write about that cause it is very true but when I really thought about it I wanted to send a deeper message. We shouldn’t be afraid to let this holiday remind us of failed relationships but we also shouldn’t let us be cynical about the idea of present or future relationships. Coming from someone who went from being in a deep relationship to being very single, I’ve seen the holiday from both sides.
I’m not gonna let the day bring me down and diminish my hope and self esteem. I think the day should be seen more positively. I’m gonna think about the relationship I had and I’ll probably get a little upset but I’m not going to resent people who are spending it happily. We can get so caught up in the messiness of life that we often forget to take a moment to appreciate the one’s we love. I know i’ll be sending a lot of love tomorrow to friends and family. You can also bet my ass I’m gonna be sitting at a bar with my favorite single ladies sippin’ a martini and remembering that the single life is good for me right now. I will also be hitting up the half priced candy next week #amiright? I might be single for the holiday but I sure as hell won’t be alone.