10 Signs Concerts Aren’t For You

1. You become extremely claustrophobic when squeezed into an area so tight that you can’t move your hands without accidentally groping someone and have to remind yourself to breathe so that you don’t explode from sensory overload.

 

2. You don’t know how to dance or act in a concert setting so you just end up rocking back and forth and hoping no one realizes how lame you are.

 

3. You catch yourself just watching the Jumbotron instead of the actual performer…meaning that instead of spending $100 to go to this concert you could have just stayed home and watched clips from it on YouTube.

 

4. You have an irrational fear that people are aware that you don’t know all of the words to the performer’s songs and worry that someone will call you out on it.

 

5. The idea of spending 6 dollars on a bottle of water is almost heart attack inducing for you.

 

6. You find yourself frustrated at the fact that you can’t talk to your friend without screaming into their ear and wish they would adjust the volume so that it would be at a quieter level.

 

7. You look at your watch every 10 minutes to gauge how much of the concert is actually left and whether or not it’s worth leaving early to beat traffic.

 

8. You think opening acts are the worst thing to happen to the history of everything because it means you’re going to be at concert for a longer time.

 

9.  You don’t go to concerts because you enjoy the environment and mood- the only concerts you go to are the ones in which you know every single lyric to every song by the performer- because let’s face it I ain’t paying $100 to head bang to some random emo band.

 

10. You think music is only appropriate for car drives, background music when showering and as a mood lifter while studying for an exam that makes you want to kill yourself.

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