RuPaul Recap: Drag My Wedding

We’ve finally reached our top 6, hunties and gentlemen! And yes gawd do they sure know how to sling that shade.  This week’s main challenge is wedding themed- because you know gays can’t actually get married in most places so the only way they can live out their fantasy is on a LOGO show.  Our queens are tasked with taking the BUTCHEST, manly men and turning them into beautiful, blushing brides to be. It’s gender bending fun at it’s best.  It’s clear from the beginning of this episode who will rise to the occasion and who will fail miserably. By now we’re all well aware of Bianca’s incredible sewing skills and Ben’s mastery of a glue gun so it’s no surprise that they do the best in this challenge. We are also all painfully aware that Joslyn is really incapable of doing anything as is Adore, so it’s no surprise that they end up in the bottom two. And Darienne and Courtney, per usual, end up in the middle of the pack because they are incapable of being consistent.

What makes this episode so great, however, is the shade!  Courtney Act has really gotten the villain edit this season and while she has been portrayed as increasingly unlikable she does get points for her “Honey MahogBody” comment. Even the brides get shady, especially Darienne’s drag daughter- but it’s no surprise because if you’re raised by something that bitchy chances are you’ll end up the same way. Unfortunately a lot of time is wasted on Joslyn’s professional athlete/bride who spends the episode freaking out over what his teammates will think when they see him drag. Newsflash sir, you weren’t forced to be on this show. Also bitch thinks he’s cute pulling a Willam and vomiting on the side of the stage- JOSLYN deserved better!

This week our guest judges are Neil Patrick Harris and his more attractive but entirely more irrelevant husband, David Burtka. While the two are a cute addition to the panel, they don’t really offer too much as judges and the episode seems too jam packed with material for them to have any time to really give feedback.  All you need to know is that in the end almost every bride was a butterface.In fact, the only remotely feminine bride is Darienne’s but I hate her so I won’t commit to complimenting her.  Before the final lip sync, our drag brides and their spouses come onto the stage and exchange vows. It’s cute but also incredibly bizarre given how genderbent the whole situation is. But maybe that’s the point- either way I love me some RuPaul!  Adore and Joslyn end up lipsyncing to an “Aretha Franklin” song which is an incredibly questionable choice given how white these two bitches are. Adore ends up looking like she’s performing a satanic ritual and Joslyn sort of  moves it like Bernie. In the end, Joslyn is the one to go. But we’re not too worried about her post Drag race career- we know she’ll keep it Foxy!

QUEEN RANKINGS

1. Bianca Del Rio

Can we already crown Bianca the winner of this season? She’s won three challenges, never been in the bottom and has the best one liners. What else could you possibly want?


2. BenDelaCreme

If only Ben was on season 5 of drag race. Bitch would have stolen the crown from Jinkx! Ben is the second most consistent queen in the competition and her bubbly personality and insight make her impossible to hate. It seems, however, that she’s destined to be in Bianca’s shadow. She’ll really have to shake things up if she wants to walk away from this competition with the crown.

3. Adore Delano

Let’s be honest- Adore is hanging by a thread but her fan base may be just enough to catapult her into the finals. Sure she may not be the most talented of the queens but she’s incredibly likable and has served as the heart of this season. I won’t be too sad about Adore losing this season, however- I mean we all know that bitch is going to be on All Stars 2 anyways.

 

4. Courtney Act

The editors of this show must really hate Courtney Act considering they’ve only portrayed her in a negative light these past few episodes. Is Courtney superficial and a tad bit self absorbed? Of course. Is she as bad as this show is making her out to be? Probably not. When it comes down to it, Courtney has won two challenges which makes her tied for second place at the moment. But unless she switches things up with her makeup and starts wearing lipstick instead of chapstick she most likely won’t be winning this competition.

 

5. Darienne Lake

CAN’T WAIT FOR YOU TO GO  HOME NEXT WEEK! ❤

 

6. Joslyn Fox

As much as I love Joslyn Fox, she certainly overstayed her welcome this season. She was incredibly beautiful and her magnetic personality made her the most likable queen of the season- but she was just not polished enough to snag the crown.  She failed to reach the judge’s expectations week after week and it seems that her personality is what saved her in the competition. But that doesn’t mean I won’t vote her Miss Congeniality a billion times so that I can watch her get that crown at the finale.

 

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