Jambo, hennies! Welcome back to my weekly RuPaul’s Drag Race recap where I try to thinly veil my love for Thorgy Thor as to appear an unbiased reviewer! Mama Ru has no time for shenanigans for this episode, so we skip the mini challenge and jump right into the maxi challenge: an 80’s style new wave girl band concert. Our queens are tasked with writing lyrics, coming up with creative choreography, and inventing personas that fit each of their group styles: pop, punk, and synth.
Mayhem (Miller) ensues when Ru informs the girls that they are in charge of picking their own groups and band assignments. The New York Queens (Bob, Thorgy, and Acid Betty) quickly band together as do Naomi, Robbie, and Kim, leaving Derrick, Naysha, and Chi Chi to form an unlikely trio. The New York Queens and Team Leftovers fight over the pop option, but Team New York snatches it when Chi Chi expresses her desire to do synth.It’s clear from the beginning that Chi Chi is going to royally screw up things for her group. Girl is too focused on trying to put together a neon bathing suit to actually contribute meaningfully. While it’s sad that Chi Chi has no money, she’s really got to learn how to look beyond the cash prize and stay in the moment.
Our queens meet with Lucian Piane, RuPaul’s music producer, and things get messy. Dragometry (Derrick, Naysha, and Chi Chi) struggle to make their music less shitty, and Derrick fights for the right to sing, which judging by her voice is something she may want to consider waiving. Les Chicken Wings (Naomi, Robbie, and Kim) barely know how to yell let alone tap into the energy needed for punk. The biggest cluster fuck, however, is Street Meatz (Bob, Thorgy, and Acid Betty.) Bob comes for both Lucian and Lorde, and Thorgy’s perfectionist attitude creates severe team tension. You know it’s bad when Acid Betty is the drama free one in the group.
Despite any setbacks, the queens deliver! Les Chicken Wings is campy, but has just enough cheeky humor to make up for the fact that these girls don’t possess a single ounce of angst. Robbie, who has been struggling with self doubt since being in the bottom 2 during the previous episode, truly redeems herself. I don’t really know what their song was about, but props for fitting in a Kim Chi lisp joke!
Street Meatz is as hilarious and weird as expected.The New York queens may be loud, they may be sometimes obnoxious, but they possess more talent and charisma than all the other queens combined. Dragometry fails to stand out. The outfits are bland, the lyrics have something to do with rectangles, and the actual assigned music track is rather uninspired. Out of the three options, they really ended up with the bottom of the barrel.
Following the main challenge, there’s an abbreviated “neon realness” runway. Lucian Piane and Debbie Harry and Chris Stein of Blondie act as the guest judges.
Here’s the breakdown:
Acid Betty: Alien glamour.
Kim Chi: Surreal fantasy.
Robbie: Marie Antoinette on acid.
Naysha: Sexy splatter paint goddess.
Naomi: Polly Pocket plays tennis.
Derrick: Marco Marco on a budget.
Thorgy: Monster from the neon abyss.
Bob the Drag Queen:Leigh Bowery house down boots.
Chi Chi: Captain Hooker.
Robbie is named the winner of the challenge, which is fair, but not incredibly exciting. Next week is “Snatch Game” though so maybe she’ll start to gain some momentum. Naysha, Chi Chi, and Derrick end up in the bottom 3, which shouldn’t be surprising to Derrick given that she’s almost always there. Naysha is told her outfit was bland and her performance was blander, Chi Chi is lambasted for her cheap runway and poor attitude, and Derrick is told she has faded into the background yet again. In the end Chi Chi and Naysha are left to lip-sync for their lives to Blondie’s “Call Me.” The whole thing seems pretty even until Naysha’s wig goes flying off and she starts prancing around the stage looking like a baby from the water tribe in Avatar: The Last Airbender. Chi Chi destroys the lip-sync with her trademark twirls and back flips, and unfortunately Naysha is asked to sashay away for a second time. It’s sad to see her go, but at the same time she didn’t really ever prove why she deserved to come back in the first place, so #girlbye.
Well folks, that’s it for the recap! Tune in next week to see whether our eight queens can serve celebrity realness in this season’s edition of “Snatch Game.”
RANKINGS
Thorgy
Despite her lackluster runway, Thorgy is still the fiercest competitor of the season. She’s hilarious, intelligent, and not afraid to fight for her spot.. Thorgy is a comedy clown with the drive of a pageant queen, and that combo is killer in a game like this.
Bob
For the first time this season, Bob gave us a look that was actually inspired! Her performance in the main challenge was great as well. She just needs to learn how to tone down her personality and listen.
Acid Betty
According to fan theorists (AKA Reddit), Acid Betty may leave next episode in a shocking disqualification/forfeiting kind of scenario. I wouldn’t be surprised if this was the case. Acid Betty has slain every runway, delivered in the main challenges, and has still received a lukewarm response. It feels like the judges are icing her out and testing her limits. I think it’s only a matter of time before she lets out her ugly side.
Robbie Turner
Okay, so Robbie Turner won this challenge, but I still don’t think she’s Top 3 material. She’s just not unique enough in her style! Her whole aesthetic is just “grouchier Jinkx Monsoon.” To her credit though, she did perform well these last two challenges, and her vintage looks almost always hit the mark. She just is lacking the overall originality and heart to really win over the judges and fans.
Kim Chi
Kim Chi’s a good sport, but she’s not a terrific performer. She relies on her awkwardness, which is fine for the moment. As the competition progresses, however, she’s going to have to show us that she can excel at things other than her aesthetic. We all know Kim is creative and beautiful, but we don’t know if she’s versatile enough to take a crown that has almost always been awarded to the fiercest performers.
Naomi
Naomi is still beautiful and still in the background. She’s done an adequate job in every challenge, but she’s failed to show us what she can deliver that the other queens can’t. Acid and Betty deliver better fashion, Thorgy and Bob give better comedy, so what’s her thing?
Chi Chi
Chi Chi- fantastic dancer, horrible outfits. That’s pretty much all you can say about her. The personality is there, the talent is there, but this is season 8- she’s not going to be given a free pass for her fashion like Adore Delano had. She’s really going to have to pull together some gag worthy looks or hope her challenge performances will compensate for her bad fashion.
Naysha
Naysha didn’t have a great run on the show. She was eliminated twice over the course of four episodes. With that being said, she was gorgeous and charming. Did I mention she was gorgeous?
Derrick
Oh Derrick, what are we going to do with you? Right now you’re serving Miss Fame without the incredible runway to back it up. To an extent, I feel bad that she was so hyped up because it only makes her lackluster performance even more disappointing. With every episode it’s becoming clearer that she’s not used to doing anything other than Britney, and I’m worried she’s not ever going to show us more. The reality is she’s being kept around for Snatch Game. If she fails to deliver then, her ass is going home.
Is this why I'm still single? 